I am Sick
Dear dear i am sick... i am ill. Running 38.6 degree fever. Take care muackz ... see ur smile makes my pain go away ... i love u
FusionX blogged at
12:54 AM
~ Ade's Closet ~
KTV plus Chomp Chomp makan
yet another day at work on wednesday, actually called deardear but she sounded moody. dunno why but i try to make her happy yet cannot too over because later she will feel irritated. She ask me mummy got cook i say yes duck noodles. Then she ask got cook her share then i answered yes. But if she dun wan to come over to eat dinner i can take her share. So she agreed and said she wants to go home and pack her stuff so i assumed she dun wan to eat dinner with me. Abit sad because next day is a public holiday Deepavali. Haiz i told her before that i will change, but dunno how long it will take ... i been forcing myself to change because its for us. Later in the afternoon she told me she maybe going out with her frens. i said ok lo ... as long she happy can le. Dun dare to ask too much. Haiz dunno wat i can do. i waited for her call until 12 +am then i think i should message her to see whether has she arrived home safely. But she reply she haven got home yet and i am asking too much. DO I HAVE TO REPORT TO U. Thats what she wrote. haiz heart breaking. But its the truth i can't ask too much... its because i am worried about her but maybe i am thinking too much. After i tried staying up until 3 am and feel asleep. She called me around 5+ am and i pick up immediately. I tok to her for awhile and tried not to show that i am controlling her. I am just happy she even bothered to call me and tell me she is safely home. SO happy~~~. She told me she went clubbing at dbl o with her frens. I was like 'huh' but actually my heart told me if she comes back around this time sure go clubbing. I can't say much or do much but i only realise one thing. She do not need me anymore. I feel so helpless in worrying for her. But i still love her. Haiz
Next day she woke up and called me on my mobile because i promise to reach her place around 10+am to accompany her. But i overslept. So she was angry that i broke my promise again. I felt so disappointed with myself and really felt like crying and hating myself why i always like tat. Must i really feel the pain to always remind me what is happening. I hate myself. Sometimes i just wan my dear dear to sayang me haiz.
I quickly woke up and wash up and changed into my casual attire which is track pants and collar tee. i quickly went down and took a bus to westmall took a train down to AMK. Upon reaching i called her to confirm regarding the KTV in the evening price. K box is offering 24+ for per pax and party world is offering 21+ for per pax. Nice and cheap. I bought Wan ton mee for her and i bought for myself Katsu Curry. I know she is having sorethroat from yesterday's clubbing so i bought star fruit juice and water melon juice for her to drink. Let her choose herself. I quickly took a cab to her place and woke her up to eat lunch.
Her father and aunt ask me to do some stuff for them. Her father say the SCV cablevision set is giving some problem because the image seems jagged ... so i tried to troubleshoot. In the end i think it is the set-top faulty le ... so have to change lo... then my dear came out and we had our lunch .... when i see her eating i feel happy because that is maybe the only i can do for her now to make her happy. I feel miserable haha but happy again. I think i abit 'short short'
After that lester boy computer monitor cannot power on so i went to check. But once i power on everything...it looks fine. Then dear dear took over and showed lester boy the pictures we all took last time from her portable HDD. Lester boy sometimes shy shy and funny... so cute. Haiz
After that we wanted to take a short nap because its still abit early and also she did not have enough rest so i say ok la dar dar sayang u orh orh. Muackz then Lester boy keep coming in with his english workbook and start asking us how to do this how to do that. Dear dear try to solve 3 questions from her but then i dun wan her to keep lying down and waking up so i told her u go rest i teach lester boy.
Raymond called and suggested to send us together for KTV later so we can sleep later again haha .... its just another 30 mins more that time.
Same thing i always sleep with dear dear i feel so happy and warmth i tend to really fall asleep... haha then when we woke up ... die it was already so late. Faster change and washup and go meet raymond at the other coffeeshop.
We sing KTV with Shander, Jerry, Raymond, Deardear and me. Shander has a great voice and Jerry too all very good singers. After awhile around 8pm Shander says she has to leave to collect some stuffs so Jerry accompanied and left with her. Raymond send them too. So in the end left me and dear. We sing and sing ... some things happend in a happy way ... so we enjoyed it. After that the waiter came in a inform we still have a drink left yet to order. So we were actually wanted to wait for Raymond to order but he haven return ... i see the time already 8.40pm so i think better order now or not sure later waste. So i ordered Jasmine Honey. Then Raymond came back, and luckily he managed to sing one last song before it all ended. HHAHA
After that we went to Serangoon Gardens Chomp Chomp to makan. We met up with Jerry and Shander again and went for our dinner. We order alot of food. Got BBQ Fish, Chicken Wings, Satay, LaLa, Chilli KangKong and Char Kway Teow. We enjoyed chatting and gossiping about Raymond and Jerry. The Story of their movie which Jerry cannot remember doing it. haha
After that we went home and i send my dear dear home... She pack her stuff and ask me to bring back home for her so she today no need to bring. She was trying on some of her dress for Sunday's Andrew Wedding dinner. She says she looks fat so she tried a few. I told her maybe we saturday go walk walk and see got better dress to wear lo.
I was tired but i dare not tell her ... scare she angry ... haha when she smile i feel all the tireness and stress on me is gone because i made her happy. Muackz dear thanks for the smile u always gave me Muackz I love u Dear Dear
Labels: ChompChomp, DarDar, DearDear, Jerry, KTV, Raymond, Shander
FusionX blogged at
2:03 PM
~ Ade's Closet ~
Alone in the dark
Yesterday was a long night. During work things aren't happening the way it suppose to be. I came in to office after saying good bye to my dear. As usual i left my stuff and turn on my lappy. But suddenly pple start shouting at me. Haiz ask me to do this and tat. I told them i am not feeling well but they just regard it. Piss off. After that i was thinking about dear already. Haiz... i made her angry again. Because i msn her and found out she had headache. So i showered her with my care and concern and maybe too much, she was irritated again. Why can't i just leave her alone? i asked myself. But i just can't. I actually offered to send her home after her dinner with her good 姐妹 but she say ask me dun do this kind of stupid things because i promise mummy that i will go home for dinner if i were to go send her after her dinner which is maybe 9+pm she think i am just being stupid. Haiz i dunno leh just feel like doing it. But anyway i manage to suppress my emotions and go with wat she decided. So after work i went home... i was at Novena Square. I took a train to CCK lot 1 and surprise the MRT became a small pasar malam. Alot of stalls selling nice stuff. Like shoes and clothes. Hope i get the chance to bring dear dear down and walk walk. I took a bus home and ate my dinner. Nothing special happen only when i message my dear how she is and instead of waiting for her SMS i recieved her call.... so HAPPY~~~~
She say she going to dabao food to her 姐妹 house to eat. I just told her to becareful and reach home just miss call me because i wan to chit chat with her. Muackz. After hanging up the call, I waited and waited. Watching TV surfing internet. I went to look for retro songs on Imeem and found Mambo Jumbo Retro from Zouk. All the songs are the usual retro. I went to look for the lyrics too and also dance abit at home ahahhaha.... crazy... But because i wan to teach my dear how to dance retro at least when she is down at dbl o with me she wun feel left out. Sorry dear always never do it ASAP. Muackz
After awhile she message me saying she reached home and going to bathe later miss call me... i was happy again
Not because of wat she said.... is because she is back home safe. Late in the night dangerous ma ... so have to play safe. I can;t be there but i must also make sure she is safe. Luckily Toro-San aka Chris which is her 姐妹 bf send my dear home for me .... phew Thanks man Toro.
We chit chat abit over the phone and eventually she fell asleep. Haha maybe the things i said very boring thats why she fell asleep. Anyway i am happy. i dunno why but i am. Dear i love u muackz take care of yourself k.
Labels: Dar Dar, Dear dear, Toro， 姐妹
FusionX blogged at
11:03 AM
~ Ade's Closet ~
Friday night to Sunday
Long ago... Someone in my life said this to me that if a person is going to leave u... u will have 2 kind of feelings... one is being lonely and the other is losing someone who is important to u... i dun feel both of that but i felt something else which is i realised that when i really looked deep into my heart and found that my heart was the one i lost.Last friday, my dear came... we had the usual dinner and plannings. I was happy ... really happy. Although i been doing all kinds of things to make her happy, indirectly i may have irritated her again. Haiz stupid me. I always tried to tell myself i should tolerate because i wan her back, not to scare her away. She once said she will once in awhile wan to enjoy her freedom(going out with frens enjoy being free) but she knows she will get tired of this. I am willing to wait and work hard for both of us because i know when she is happy i am happy. I really do feel that. Because on Sunday I saw her beautiful smile and i really feel she was happy because of me. No one can bring that smile within me anymore except her. Dear u hold a very important place in my heart. We were at Westmall after work, we went to buy lots of things. New bedsheet and also wallet for both of us... couple couple ma.
Saturday, i woke up with her because i promise her to go work with her regardless whether i am tired or not. After her work we went to our usual which is AMK Hub and enjoyed the lunch at the foodcourt and after that guess what we saw. It was 物物大交换 it was hosted by Mark Lee and Calvin Su. Dear said to me since we got nothing else then walking around, can we stay and watch the filming. She say everytime got this kind of filming she never get the chance to stay throughout because of tired. So i said ok and stayed. We saw them joke and that Calvin Su is 'big'. Means he is abit plump la haha~~. After lunch around 2pm + they came back from their lunch and started the filming. Alot of jokes and fun happend... like the small children telling the story of the item they wanted to trade. So CUTE~~~~. In the end we wanted to take picture with them but scare paiseh. But after that i went over and told them can i take a picture with them? they said ok sure. First they took with my dear, after that with me. I always wanted to remind Calvin Su that remember me? I was the guy who called long ago to 933fm in the late night last call. I wanted to dedicate a song but he say he couldn't find so he suggested another song. So bo bian lo. But he say dun say on AIR haha. So when on AIR he asked me that and i said that he dun have the song i wan so he gave me another song lo haha~~~ bad hor. But in the end we just took the pictures and left. We went for out regular foot reflexology then we wanted to have our dinner but we did not. I told my dear that i never smoke for the whole day. She was happy for me. But its true. For her i can quit and do everything that is good for us. During our Salsa class, we had a small fight, but it quiet down eventually. I told myself i must tolerate. When we reach home we did not bathe, because dear dear always like to sleep on my bed and fall asleep. I always like to see her sleep. Her cute face always tend to make my heart feel so warmth. I told her i will wake her up but in the end i also fall asleep. HAHA.
In the middle of the night, i woke up around 3am + and cannot take the addiction of ciggarette so i went to take my dads cigg. But she woke up also and saw me smoking ... and she was angry. I explained to her and slowly she relaxed. In the end only i bathed because i had wax on my head. In the morning we woke up a few times becuase of the noise that was produced by my neighbour... drilling sound. It was them installing a CCTV outside their door to catch the "underwear thief". After that we just continued sleeping till 3pm and woke up and bathe and eat our so called lunch. After that we watched SCV and it was time for dinner so i decided to buy food for her as she can rest at home. I went to Westmall and bought KFC 3pc meal and zinger meal. Then proceed to nearby coffeeshop to buy Sharkfin soup but they were out of that. Haiz Sorry dear did not get the one u wanted to have. After that i packed abit of my room and changed the new bedsheet. also i took a wet cloth and started cleaning the hell out of my dusty room. I know it maybe too late to do all this. But i wan to show her that i really have the heart to change. Its never too late to change.
She was watching anime from youtube as we were actually trying to d/l anime to watch. some of the series i had. But in the end she was hooked on by an anime series called Aishiteru Ze Baby. Cute nice anime.
Haiz but today which is monday she says she was scolded for 3 times on the same thing. I dunno wat i can do for her ... but i hope i can make her feel better. Dear Dear ... Dar dar Sayang k ... love u muackz
Labels: Calvin Su, Dear dear, Mark Lee, Vin Vin
FusionX blogged at
4:12 PM
~ Ade's Closet ~
My confession
Things has happened so fast that all that i can think of is her. Haiz Life has been way too difficult without her. I felt handicapped. Why pple keep reminding and say must cherish but in the end they dun. I understand why. Because now when things happen and can't be resolved by just saying pls forgive me, i know what to do and cherish in my life. I really love u dear. I really do... all the things i have said and done proves me and to you that i am willing to take a step forward and change for the better future. Like i have said i may not be the perfect guy for you. But i will try to meet ur means and target of life. I have applied for my studies in Direct Bachelor's in BIT (Business IT) and also i will resume my driving lessons on next week. Hopefully i know i may think too much and rushing things too fast paced. But if u could understand wat is undergoing inside my emotions and heart. U will know how much i wish u could be by my side. 
I know u are afraid that i will be another 3 min guy who say and dun do or may not last again. I told u and myself that it will never happen again. Losing u is already that painful... i can;t take another one. Trust me dear. I know i can do it and i will. Give me a chance.
During this time being i am totally lost .... i keep looking at how happy we were in the past and also how loving we are. Dear Dear if u are reading this, I dun dare to ask for anything. I only need your love care and concern. Sorry i always never take note of small things that lead to all the quarrels we had.
From now onwards, i will change for the better. For everything i can do to make u happy because i love u. I need u. U are the one i can have that makes my life meaningful. Sorry deardear let me take care of u ok? Do reply me if u can thanks
Labels: vin vin regret
FusionX blogged at
3:07 PM
~ Ade's Closet ~